
May 9
th is Military Spouse Appreciation Day and I just wanted to let Haley know how much it means to me that she married me and the sacrifices that she is making. There are a couple of old sayings about wives and the army. The first is, “If the army wanted you to have a wife, they would issue you one.” The second, “An army wife is the toughest job in the Army.” Being in the military isn’t a job; it’s a way of life. For some that way of life will last for 20 years, for others it’s only for their initial tour.
It has its own rules and is very demanding and uncompromising and is hard enough for those who have taken the oath to serve. As the two adages point out, its even harder for the people like Haley, who serve quietly back home in their own way, making sacrifices every day, and without whose support the war effort wouldn’t be able to succeed.
I just want to take a moment and thank Haley for all her love and support, without which I wouldn’t be able to do my job over here.
When I joined the army, I had three months to prepare myself and get my life in order before I left for Basic Training. Then I went through over seven months of training to learn how to become a soldier and get adjusted to structure, discipline, and pace of military life. Three times now I've had to put everything on hold: drop classes, cancel training, miss holidays/ Penn State football season, and deploy on short notice to some crazy place (near or far) not knowing what to expect. All of which is fine, that’s where the structure, discipline, and training kick in and comes with serving in the military.
Haley has been given a crash course and welcome into the army family. Within 10 days of being engaged we were put on notice of my deployment. Her first sacrifice was to put aside her plans for our wedding in June. Then she learned the hurry up and wait meter to military life as we had to prepare for a wedding without knowing when or how much time I would even get before deploying. When we were given the word, she organized our amazing wedding in less than 4 days and it turned out absolutely perfect.
Haley’s next lesson was learning that the army was going to take some of the limited time we had together before I left. As she worked hard to turn my apartment into our home, she saw me coming and going with last minute training and a night jump to make sure I was prepared to leave. She was amazing and because of her hard work we were able to spend quality time together as well as get things in order as best we could before I left.
Now Haley’s biggest sacrifice is having her husband taken away for the better part of her first year of marriage. She saw me off to the airport after less than a month of being married. Fortunately we’re able to communicate regularly and I’m in a fairly safe assignment. There are still times though where I can’t talk about all the stuff that I’m doing and I know that is hard on her and she worries. That alone is a noble sacrifice, but she is also doing it while she’s pregnant. Not only that but she has just completed the work on her Masters degree in Nursing, which is a challenge enough without everything else she is doing. Still she is loving and supporting and is soldiering on and meeting the challenge. All of this in less time than it took me to complete all of my training and be ready for my unit at Fort Bragg. I am so thankful and proud of her.
I love you sweetie. Thank you for your love and support and I cherish you.
Just because I get up early and wear a uniform, doesn't mean that I'm the only one that is serving my country during this deployment. As one of my pastor's (who is a Vietnam veteran) said before I left this time, there are those that serve in silence; those that aren't thanked when they're walking through an airport, or in the mall, or just down the street. They are the people like Haley, who have married into the army. If you know any, be sure to thank them for their service and sacrifices as well.